


it figures all I'm thinking about is you

by torigates



Category: Friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-04
Updated: 2013-11-04
Packaged: 2017-12-31 12:06:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1031537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torigates/pseuds/torigates
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It’s Rachel,” Joey said, and watched Ross walk out of Central Perk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	it figures all I'm thinking about is you

 

  
“It’s Rachel,” Joey said, and watched Ross walk out of Central Perk.

It was bad. Joey knew that. There were certain things that a person just didn’t do. No matter how much they might want it, or how much they couldn’t stop thinking about it, or how much they _wanted_ it. No matter what.

Falling in love with his best friend’s ex-girlfriend was one of those things.

Joey had tried. He had _tried_ so hard not to love Rachel. He had tried not to give into his feelings, and when it had turned out that he couldn’t stop the way he felt he had tried to ignore it. He had tried so hard.

It wasn’t enough.

Everything he said to Ross was true: he couldn’t stop thinking about her, he couldn’t sleep. She was always on his mind. He loved her. He _loved_ Rachel. He didn’t want to, but he did.

Joey wasn’t a fool. He went into it with his eyes open. He knew how Ross would react, he knew how Rachel would react, he could predict how everything would happen.

It was all so unfair. He had never, ever felt the same way about another person as he did about Rachel. Not with any of his girlfriends, not even with Kathy. It figured, the one girl he could never, ever have. Sometimes he wondered if he was just meant to be alone. The way he went through relationships and women, he had always assumed it was because he just hadn’t found the right person. Maybe it was more than that. Maybe there wasn’t a right person for him. Not if he was only ever going to love Rachel.

Even setting Ross’ reaction aside there was Rachel herself. Joey had been there through the entire Ross and Rachel saga. He had seen and experienced all their highs and lows; the intensity of their emotions. With them it was never really over.

What kind of chance did he stand next to that?

He couldn’t blame Ross. Not for his reaction to Joey’s admission, not for staying angry with him. There were some things a person should never do to their friends. Falling in love with their ex-girlfriend was just one of those things.

As much as Joey loved Rachel, as much as he wanted to be with her, and have her return those feelings for him, it wasn’t possible. And he knew he could never do that to Ross, because Ross would never be okay with it.

Monica found him.

“Hey,” she said, poking her head into the apartment. Joey was sitting on his chair, aimlessly surfing the channels. There was nothing on television. Or, there was nothing on that could hold his attention. Even _Wheel of Fortune_ wasn’t doing it for him.

Joey nodded at her over his shoulder, and turned his gaze back to the TV screen. He heard Monica shut the door, but he didn’t say anything.

“I heard,” she told him, walking over and sitting on the arm rest of his chair. She put her arm around his shoulders, and Joey leaned into her.

“Do you hate me too?” he asked after a moment. He thought she would. He deserved it.

“What?” she asked, and pulled back to look him in the eye. “Joey, of course not! Why would you even think that?”

He sighed and rubbed the back of his arm. “Ross hates me,” he said. “I hate me.”

She pulled him into a hug. Her arms were tight around his shoulders, and she pressed her face into the top of his head. “Ross does not hate you,” she said into his hair. “He’s upset right now. You know how Ross gets when he’s upset. He doesn’t know how to handle it.”

Joey shrugged. “It’s not that,” he said. “I crossed a line. There are some things you just shouldn’t do.”

Monica rubbed his back. “He’ll come around,” she promised. “You just need to give Ross some time.”

He sighed, and pulled away from the hug. “I never meant for this to happen.”

“I know,” Monica said.

“And it’s not like anything would ever happen! I would never even tell Rachel. I wouldn’t do that to Ross.”

“I know,” she said again.

They were quiet for a while. Monica continued to rub his back, and Joey felt guilty for taking comfort in it. He shouldn’t be feeling better now. He should feel horrible.

“I think I need to move to Vermont,” he said after a while. It was the first place that popped into his head, but once he said it out loud it made sense. He owed it to Ross.

“Vermont?” Monica asked. She looked confused.

“Ross isn’t going to get over it,” Joey started.

“Joey,” she interrupted.

“No,” he said. “He won’t. And I--I should step back. Leave the country.”

She opened and closed her mouth. “You’re not moving to Vermont,” she said finally. “I’ll talk to Ross.”

She stood and headed for the door.

“Mon,” he called.

“Yeah,” she asked, turning back to face him.

“Thanks,” he said.

She smiled. “You’re welcome.”

“Can you also find out where I can get some Vermont money?”


End file.
